Love or Obsession?

Everyday I’m scared,

I might lose you,

you might disappear

leaving me in despair

Am I holding you,

when all you want is to break-free?

Am I being selfish?

Or I’m just paranoid?

Obsessed?…

I love you

And.

The idea of losing you,

it kills me

I’d rather die;

Than to see you

in the arms of other woman

I love you 

I hope you love me like the way I wanna be loved.

It might be impossible,

but I will never stop hoping

but will try not to expect

for expecting,

is another form of torture

Oh boy, 

Is this obsession?

I am Your Trainee, Maam.

This day is a busy one, It exhausts me. I do not usually narrate about what happened to my everyday life, but now.. please allow me.

It’s a miracle that I was able to wake myself and get up very early knowing that my body clock has already changed since summer vacation. I woke up at around 6 a.m. to prepare myself and the things i need so I could attend the indoor cycling class by 7:30 a.m. and my OJT (On-the-job training) orientation by 10 a.m. Luckily, I made it although I was late in the orientation because of the forever manila traffic.And by the way, I’m never the early bird! Allow me to let you know that I am always late, I can’t help it.

OJT- ‘The Philippine Star’ Newspaper

I’m an incoming senior who will be taking my practicum  this summer and I will be starting tomorrow. I had a mixed emotion, I’m excited but scared that I might not meet their expectations; I love to write but I’m not yet a good writer. I always try to think that someday I can write better, that someday I will be your future credible broadcast journalist.

Tomorrow is my first leg work! I will be attending a Dengue Summer Press Conference in heritage hotel and since it will be my first experience, I can’t stop myself from being scared. I have so many things in mind, “What will happen tomorrow?”, “What to do?”, “How will I deal with all the pressure?”, “Am I capable?” and etc…CAN I BE A GOOD WRITER SOMEDAY?

But to sum my emotion up, the feeling of excitement is still dominant especially if I am passionate with what I will be doing. It excites me that I can finally apply everything that I’ve learned in my chosen degree and somehow, I can already have a glimpse of my future career and how it feels like to be a media practitioner. I don’t know how and I don’t know why.. but I am very eager to develop my verbal and written communication skills. I am a dreamer, and a believer.

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After attending the orientation, I went to my dentist to FINALLY, after four years…remove my braces. It was also a mixed emotion, the feeling of excitement that I can finally get rid of it and the feeling of sadness because I will miss my braces. (I will share my story and experiences in a different blog).

After a long time spent in my dentist, I went back to the gym to workout again (That is my addiction, can’t stop myself). 2 hours in the gym again, body combat and body step until I finally felt exhausted and now, I’m home and blogging. xoxo